Bad dream sums up my life at the moment

>> Wednesday, January 20, 2010

I had this awful dream about my oldest who just became a teenager.  I dreamt that I went to pick her up from school because of a rash on her face (in real life, that rash is mine).  In the car, she'd slipped about how she had a ride on a motorcyle.  I told her she was not allowed on a motorcycle at all at her age even if it was her friend's dad's motorcycle (in real life, I don't like this man all that much at the moment and my cousin died on a motorcycle due to the other driver's fault, not his).  She got sulky and under her breath called me a "sissy [insert name of female dog here]".  I, of course, grounded her right away for lying to me about the motorcycle and for the name-calling which made her really mad.  She came at me like she was going to get physically aggressive.  I told her before she got to me that she was then grounded even longer and she backed off. 

My daughter has never called me names or became physically aggressive towards me.  While I expect a few names slinged at me in the coming years, I can't see her ever getting physically aggressive towards me.  It was just a really weird dream.  I would expect that physical aggression from my stepson but not my daughter.

It's funny how my dream combined my hives, my little struggle with my oldest becoming a teenager, and the man who is causing a friend of mine hurt right now.  My subconscious rolled it all into one dream for me. 

I did struggle a bit with my daughter turning into a teenager.  Her hormones have been screaming "teen" for the better part of this last year but her birthday made it official.  She's already worried about her weight (she is tall and thin and fit from four days a week of cheerleading).  She doesn't have any future concerns about diet pill side effects and I'm hoping she never will.  I don't understand how girls who are thin and healthy looking can see themselves as fat.  I'd LOVE to have my body back from my mid-to-late teens.  I wish I would have appreciated it more when I had it instead of just wishing I had it back after I lost it.


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