Keeping Contact with the Kids

...even if they act like it doesn't matter and that a few weeks of their time with us a year is more a burden than a joy (to them).

Despite the kids' change in attitude the last few years to protect their mother's feelings over their relationship with us, and the resulting lessening of contact by them, we still continue to maintain it. It's not easy. There have been so many times where I've thrown my hands up and said "to hell with it" because of something the kids have done, or not done (usually not done) but it's an emotional reaction that calms and cooler heads prevail once it's over and you do what you have to for the kids in the hopes that when they are adults, they will realize (yeah, right, but there's always hope right?).

At no time, EVER, will the kids be able to say that we didn't care, that we didn't love them. Oh yeah, I'm sure they will try, because parental alienation is a hard nut to crack, but boxes of copies of everything can't be wrong though now can it?

So we continue contact. Hubby calls them regularly even if they don't say a whole lot on the phone. This past week, we sent them a text with pic of their sister at the basketball game, a greeting card, a letter on the happenings in the family (mostly with their siblings who they don't show enough attention to!) and their siblings' school pictures. Who knows what they receive though, ya know? There were times when we'd ask the kids if they received a letter, etc. and they'd have no idea what we were talking about. After we asked, it would show up. Imagine that!

Spring break is coming which means it is time to consider dates for parenting time. Do they want to be here? No, because it means leaving their mother alone and too many times of seeing her crying when they left did its work on them.

I just want to let out a huge sigh just thinking about it and what should be (without parental alienation) instead of what is.