SD 19 Years Old Today

>> Thursday, December 29, 2011

Today my stepdaughter turned 19. She was two years old when I met her - this little thing that would come running into the apartment and the first thing out of her mouth was asking where I was. Then I would hear her little feet running through the place looking for me until she'd find me and run into my arms. She was a loving, sweet child.

What changed these past few years...

Years of having to be emotionally responsible for her mother?
Years of being put in the middle?
Years of living with white trash?
Parental alienation?
Years of hearing the verbal spewing from one side of the family?
Years of being emotionally punished for being loving to dad and dad's family?
Years of parenting time interference?
Years of being taught that dad isn't important?
Unnecessary Prozac?
Teenage Angst?

One of these?  All of the above?


Smirking Cat December 30, 2011 at 11:59 AM  

Your stepdaughter has the same birthday as my stepson! He turned 13 yesterday.

I have been in the kids' lives for about 6 years, and I have wondered if or when they will turn on me, after years of being told to (ordered to) by their mother. I hold onto hope that they will rise above the example she has set.

Are you or your husband able to have a direct conversation with your SD about where her behavior or attitudes come from? It seems like she should be old enough to figure out for herself that she's been manipulated, but I guess if it's been happening long enough, she is like my stepkids and so confused, she doesn't know which end is up by now.

Syn January 11, 2012 at 1:31 PM  

I never would have thought it could happen with sd. I really didn't all those years ago when we were so close. I don't know what happened to her - I don't know this person she grew into. She's not anything like the little girl I was so close to for the first decade of our marriage.

DH and his daughter argued a lot before her graduation about her behavior and she wasn't very nice. I've talked to him about why he doesn't do this and that and he says he doesn't feel like he has any right to anymore, that they don't look at him as having any right to and it wouldn't make any difference. SD just doesn't make sense in how she behaves, talks, etc. She was daddy's girl when she was younger. She was sweet, sensitive, smart, caring, loving and affectionate - she was just like her dad. Didn't expect her to be come a clone of her mother as an adult I guess.

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