He Ruined Her Pretend Image! Interesting thought...

I think I've figured it out!  During the last 15+ years of my husband's ex-girlfriend being angry and bitter, I thought she was behaving so ugly because my husband didn't want her, he moved on and married happily.  I thought she used the kids by emotionally manipulating to get back at him because he didn't love her and wanted nothing to do with a romantic relationship with her all the while she played victim to his family and pretended to be something she wasn't - nice, civil, fair, human (take your pick).  I thought she warped her kids because she was bitter over the fact that their dad didn't want her.

Well, I don't think that was it.  Well, that wasn't all of it anyway.

You see, the ex likes to pretend she's the Virgin Mary in terms of her religious beliefs (never mind that she hasn't gone to church in a decade and had two kids out of wedlock, three pregnancies - from two different guys while never being married).  *Shhhh, nobody is supposed to remember that.*


I think the fact that my husband's refusal to set a wedding date and moving on left her unable to hide behind a marriage license the fact that she had sex outside of marriage.  That had to burn.  In her very Catholic family, that's a huge no-no (though her family hated HIM for it after it was all said and done, not her - like she didn't share 50% of the blame for creating those kids outside of marriage).  She can't introduce a husband who fathered those kids, or even an ex-husband - legitimizing those pregnancies in the church's eyes that she tries to pretend she's such a devout follower of to everybody.

Now - I don't believe in the sex is a sin outside of marriage bit.  I personally think what goes on between consenting adults is between those consenting adults and not anybody else - not other family members, not a church, etc.  My crank over this is the fact that the ex tries to pretend she is somebody she isn't to everybody (and some are even silly enough to believe her) and takes no responsibility for the problems.

How did I come to that conclusion?  A comment she left on my stepdaughter's facebook about her going to a nice, Catholic college (away from the "damn sluts" at her current high school).  Hmmm...whose the "damn slut" in her view of her life?  SHE would technically be one of those "damn sluts" by her own view of her religion.  Now she can try to buy her religious image back by sending my stepdaughter to a Catholic college for $65K/year.  Hope that turns out well for her.