Big Medical Bills for the Ex

>> Monday, July 14, 2014

Yeah, our health fund is gone due to the ex/stepkids. Our four minor kids don't need full health insurance coverage for the rest of year I guess. That's going to cost us the rest of the year now.

Funny thing is about this whole situation, and I have to admit I laughed my behind off quite a bit over this...

The ex went so far over the health fund MOST of the deductible we have to meet before insurance will partially pick up coverage again was applied to all the visits she took the ADULT stepkids too. She cost us a few hundred dollars of that deductible out of our pocket but the rest - it's all hers since she hasn't cut the umbilical cord to the adult kids yet. Yes, she is still paying their bills and doing everything for them like they're still 12. How about actually having SS get a job and help pay his medical bills? Nah, that would be too logical and adult-like.

She contacted hubby yesterday asking him about the insurance. It seems she had some of these big bills come in.  Oops. It's the same insurance we've always had. It just worked out (FINALLY) that that deductible is mostly going to be paid by her now (usually, the way the claims went in, WE got stuck with it and are still paying on those bills from last year). Not this year!! *high five*

I ripped into my husband yesterday about their conversation over the insurance. I'm just tired. There should be no conversation with her about this. This issue isn't between HER and HIM, it's between his ADULT kids and him. I'd just had it and blew. The excuse...they don't know about insurance doesn't fly with me. Just because their mother babies them doesn't mean WE have to as well. Explain it to them. They aren't stupid adults, just too dependent on their mommy. If mommy needs to know, let THEM tell her. SHE isn't in "our" equation anymore.

I can't wait until the enrollment period comes around again so we can take a few adults off our policy.


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Irritable...again

After all these years, I still get SO SICK of this situation at times. Like now.

Who thought the ex would disappear after the kids turned 18 (except for graduations, etc.)? Oh, silly me, I did.

What was I thinking?

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Summer Remodeling Moving Along...

We've been doing a lot of remodeling at our house (getting it ready to put it up for sale). We finally finished the new bedroom so our two youngest girls aren't sharing a bedroom. Unless the stepkids come over (which is hardly ever...once every year or so), our kids have their own room now. I can hear my nine-year-old pulling out her electric guitar we got her from http://www.musiciansfriend.com and plucking at it every night in her own bedroom. She never did that before. I told her if she keeps at her guitar, I'll give her one of my guitar amps to use to actually plug the thing in and get loud with it.

As much as our two girls wanted their own bedrooms, they sure do spend a lot of time together in one of the bedrooms together though. It's funny. I think they miss each other (just a little bit).

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Another Kid in Therapy?

>> Thursday, July 10, 2014

We just saw an insurance claim for my adult stepson come through for an appointment he had a couple months ago. We were never told about this. He saw my stepdaughter's psychiatrist (who gives her Prozac for anxiety attacks she never had here, only at mom's). Wonder if the ex is drugging up their son too instead of getting herself therapy. 


Lord. BOTH stepkids in therapy? OUR mutual kids haven't been sent into therapy due to our parenting. Yet she is mother of the year.

Give me a break. 

If she had gotten herself therapy years ago (like the kids' childhood therapists at that time had suggested - each therapist they saw and she fired after they blamed her for the kids' issues), her kids probably wouldn't be messed up adults. 

Gawd, the things angry ex's do to their kids...continued into adulthood. Crazy!! 

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Medical Insurance for Adult Stepkids. Yea or No?

>> Thursday, June 26, 2014

Health insurance for adult kids - a conundrum.

My stepkids are both adults. They live with their mom and are on mom's insurance. Dad has always carried him on his insurance too. It's been a big hit for us to do so because we have a health fund (once it's used up, it becomes 100% out of pocket up to a certain amount and then 20% out of pocket thereafter and the ex takes the kids to the doctor's for anything and everything), however, they were minors and we took care of them, of course. They're not minors anymore. Well, the ex used up the entire 2014 health fund for the adult kids this past month on doctor visits (I say the ex used it up because even though they are adults, they're still attached to the umbilical cord).


  • We have no choice on who these "kids" see for doctors using our insurance. 
  • We have no choice on what these "kids" go to the doctors for using our insurance.
  • We have no input onto the treatment for these "kids" using our insurance.
  • 99% of the time, they could care less about dad or siblings unless it's time to give him their Christmas list. Seriously, not a phone call or text on Father's Day - again. I expect nothing and I'm not disappointed. Dad, on the other hand, gets disappointed regularly.


Yet our health fund is now at $0 and we're only halfway through the calendar year. We have four minor children with no money left in the health fund until January, 2015. So, now it will be 100% of medical care out of pocket for a chunk of change, then 20% after we hemorrhage all that money for awhile.

So, would you continue to cover adult kids who don't live with you, when they have other medical insurance, under these circumstances?

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